The Good Hooch Is That a​-​Way

by The Cupcake Conquistadors

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credits

released August 19, 2013

Special thanks to Cole, Dylan, Nick, Victor, John, Patrick,
and our beloved muse, Ina Garten

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about

The Cupcake Conquistadors Athens, Georgia

Courtland H.
&
Chris P.

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Track Name: Strap-On Woman Blues
got my woman, strap-on twelve inch long
got my woman, strap-on twelve inch long
when that bitch gets goin' she just won't take no

lord have mercy, I just can't sit down
I'm said lord have mercy, I just can't sit down
yeah everybody knows my baby, roughest ride in town

wake up in the mornin' just as sore as I can be
strap-on woman blues lord they are slowly killin' me

yeah I wake up in the mornin' just as sore as I can be
strap-on woman blues lord they are slowly killin' me

got my woman, strap-on twelve inch long
got my woman, strap-on twelve inch long
yeah she gave my ass a-poundin' and then I wrote this song
Track Name: ECT
yeah I've been told there's nothing left upstairs
your eyes don't lie
the memory of my face just isn't there
it's zapped away
and one more time the cuckoo flew into that nest he made for you

remember lying on your bedroom floor
you saw the moon
I thought I want it all but I want more
it hits so hard
I came to see a friend of mine but let's tell tales to pass the time

and what is this fading all worth for me
is it just a drunken fool you see
I thought by now I would know it all
I thought I could drink like a day on the job and
forget just like you and the past they robbed
I thought by now I would know it all

remember lying on your bedroom floor
you saw the moon
I thought I want it all but I want more
it hits so hard
I came to see a friend of mine but let's tell tales to pass the time

and what is this fading all worth for me
is it just a drunken fool you see
I thought by now I would know it all
I thought I could drink like a day on the job and
forget just like you and the past they robbed
I thought by now I would know it all
Track Name: So Much For Please, Baby
well my baby, took her love away
my baby, made me cry today
waking up in this bed all alone
please bring your lovin' home
oh lord I can't go on this way no no no I can't

please baby, don't you do this to me
no please baby, I'm on my hands and my knees
looking up at the stars in the sky
ask the good lord please tell me why
did my baby break my heart and I oh now baby I

(and I will always love you)

waking up in this bed all alone
please bring your lovin' home
oh lord I can't go on this way oh no lord I can't

(and I will always love you)
Track Name: Arlington
she said she doesn't want me lying
so now there's nothing more to say
and it hurts her too much anyway
the drugs have got her head on backwards
it doesn't matter how I try
it's so hard to look her in the eyes

the nurse comes in, kicks me out
I pretend I cannot hear
kill her fast or take her slow
but please don't make me choose

and no one ever lost their breath like you
and no one ever fell apart like you
I don't know how to wind this goddamn clock of yours
the canary's dead, she's too far gone
oh lord why did it take so long
to murder her and get this off my chest
please put them back together now

I remember driving up to Lee's house
and standing in the pouring rain
soon we'll have to do it all again
the Lord has got my head on backwards
i'd hoped that he would hear my call
but he's just a sadist after all

the nurse comes in, kicks me out
I pretend I cannot hear
kill her fast or take her slow
but please don't make me choose

and no one ever lost their breath like you
and no one ever fell apart like you
I don't know how to wind this goddamn clock of yours
the canary's dead, she's too far gone
oh lord why did it take so long
to murder her and get this off my chest
please put them back together now

and no one ever lost their breath like you
and no one ever fell apart like you
I don't know how to wind this goddamn clock of yours
the canary's dead, she's too far gone
oh lord why did it take so long
to murder her and get this off my chest
please put them back together now
Track Name: Yeah My Baby's Freshly Squeezed
going down to the market square
gonna get some lemons there
I'm gonna see my baby girl tonight
make fresh squeezed lemonade
a little sugar takes it all the way
we'll make that lemonade all day and night

makin' that sweet lemonade in the morning
makin' that sweet lemonade at night
makin' that sweet lemonade in the kitchen and the butt
her friends all know I squeeze that girl just right

oh yeah my baby's freshly squeezed
my baby's freshly squeezed you know
I'm telling you my baby's freshly squeezed
Track Name: Girl, I Wish I Was A Leaf
girl I wish I was a leaf
so that when fall came I would die
and turn a pleasant shade of gold
and you could look in my eyes
can you answer me when I ask
do you show me love or pity
instead of your love
I'd rather have
the courage to fall
from the tree

and when you kill me make it quick
cause loving you makes me so sick
cause I might be allergic

girl I wish I was a leaf
preserved in you diary pages
crushed between your confessions
where nothing ever changes
where no trees grow from seeds
but I don't want that cure
I want you to be my release
and I'll be terminal like you are

and when you kill me make it quick
cause loving you makes me so sick
lies, vomit, lies, vomit,
I just can't give you your way
cause I might be allergic
Track Name: Gangster Boogie
I was walking down Springdale Street just the other day when I
saw an old fling coming the other way
she asked why I didn't come round no more to give her any nookie
and I said I'm sorry baby I've been the gangsta boogie

yeah being a gangsta's a state of mind but
doing that boogie's a state of your behind
and those whores on Springdale Street will treat you just right as long as you Gangsta Boogie with them all through the night

yeah we boogie all night until the early dawn
and then they slide those black lacy panties back on
just to head out back to the corner of Springdale again
where the gangsters roll and they boogie with sin

yeah I dig that sinful boogie and I can't miss none of it
so I score some crank and I snort that shit
with that nose I use to smell them fresh baked cookies
and all night long...it was Gangsta Boogie
Track Name: Babes In The Majors
I'm up alone cause everything shuts down so goddamn early in this town
the suns comes up, my cig goes out and one more drink my whiskey is all gone yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

baby said she fell off the horse again
and threw her lover under the bus
and my old band is turning to soldiers
my neighbors keep on turning to dust
some fill in the holes in their shot guns
and some of them have nothing to show
but nothing could have prepared me
for the beautiful ache in my soul

close the door put out the light
you know I won't be coming home tonight
the buzz has crawled into my eyes
the lines and lights just keep on rushing by

baby said she fell off the horse again
and threw her lover under the bus
and my old band is turning to soldiers
my neighbors keep on turning to dust
some fill in the holes in their shot guns
and some of them have nothing to show
but nothing could have prepared me
for the beautiful ache in my soul
Track Name: The Wild Rover
I've been a wild rover for many a year
I've spent all me money on whiskey and beer
but now I'm returning with gold in great store
and I never will play the wild rover no more

and it's no nay never
no nay never no more
will I play the wild rover
no never no more

I went to an ale house I used to frequent
and I told the landlady me money was spent
I asked her for credit she answered me "Nay
such a custom as your I could have nay day"

and it's no nay never
no nay never no more
will I play the wild rover
no never no more

I took from my pockets ten sovereigns bright
and the landlady's eyes opened wide with delight
she said "I have whiskey and wines of the best
and the words that I spoke Sir were only in jest"

and it's no nay never
no nay never no more
will I play the wild rover
no never no more

I'll go home to my parents, confess what I've done
and I'll ask them to pardon their prodigal son
and if they forgive me as oft times before
sure I never will play the wild rover no more

and it's no nay never
no nay never no more
will I play the wild rover
no never no more

and it's no nay never
no nay never no more
will I play the wild rover
no never no more
Track Name: String 'Em Up
beat his ass it's all an act, and tell the lord you won't be coming back
string him up yeah string him high, do it all but make sure he don't die
die, oh yeah

can't you stand on what you preach, or is this just a case of muddled speech
put those fuckers in their place, but please don't smack that shit across my face
face, oh yeah

come on down, to a place
that fun can last for days now
but you won't be missed
pray to god it won't come to this yeah

things are all so black and white but it's so hard to tell what's wrong or right
fuck the law and fuck the ache stuff their guts till it's all they can take
take

string 'em up, strip 'em down
make 'em sing and make 'em drown now
close the joint, what a joke
pray those pigs go up in smoke now
Track Name: If
if I were a swan I'd be gone
and if I were a train I'd be late again
and if I were a good man, I'd talk with you more often than I do
Track Name: When I Lost You Twice
you whispered that you were never coming back and then you
left me standing by the railroad tracks
I searched for solace in a jug of wine
it didn't work and so I sloshed through the shine
now that was all those years ago but I still keep asking why
the only thing worse than losing you
was when I lost you twice

woke up this morning in a cold, cold sweat
those railroad tracks still there in my head
then I remember where I am and when
and take a swig of that sweet shine again
now that was all those years ago but I still keep asking why
the only thing worse than losing you
was when I lost you twice

see the man there as you pull away
saying things to you that I used to say
sometimes my brother, sometimes my friend
it still hurts the same in the end

see the man there as you pull away
saying those sweet things to you that I used to say
sometimes my brother, sometimes my friend
it still hurts the same in the end

those tracks still haunt me all throughout my day
I keep on driving but I can't get away
I'm so afraid to lay down my head
I buy some love and buy some sweet shine instead
now that was all those years ago but I still keep asking why
the only thing worse than losing you
was when I lost you twice
Track Name: Good Luck Getting A Date To The Junior Prom
a-good luck getting a date to the junior prom
(the junior prom, the junior prom)

a-good luck getting a date to the senior prom
(the senior prom, the senior prom, the senior prom, the senior prom)

good luck getting married, and good luck having kids, and good luck dying all alone with cats